Days 1 - 3
The rules for Movember are pretty simple: start clean shaven and then grow a mustache. Further more, a mustache is defined as not connecting to your sideburns (that's a beard) or your chin (that's a goatee). The latter rules aren't a worry for me, as even if I tried I couldn't break them. My upper lip remains an island of hair, related to but not actually connected with the remaining hair on my face, a bit like Britain and the EU. The first rule is more of a pain, though, as my lack of hairiness means that I would have really liked a head start. Still, in for a penny, in for a pound, so I begin Movember appropriately clean shaven.
Just because I'm playing by the rules, however, doesn't mean I'm not going to take every advantage possible. In an effort to get the maximum mustache growing time I shave at around 11:30pm on the 31st of October, thus making me clean shaven at the very start of Movember, but also giving me an extra night's worth of growth. I am quite pleased with this trick although it makes no visible difference.
The first couple of days pass without incident or, to be honest, much hair growth. In the normal course of things I tend to shave only once I get so scruffy even the cat looks down on me, which usually amounts to once every five to seven days or so. (I told you, I have low standards!) No one remarks on my appearance.
People might not be looking at me yet, but I find that I'm looking at them much more closely now that I'm Mo'ing. I catch myself assessing other men's facial hair all the time. Anyone with a hairy face isn't taking part in Movember at this point, but they provide valuable hairy role models. Do I want to go with the Seventies used car dealer weasel 'tache? Or perhaps the grizzled council refuse collector upper lip warmer? Tough call. Neither, really, if I'm honest, but I don't know how much choice I'll have. I've never intentionally grown a mustache and I don't know what my upper lip will actually produce. It could be that I'll just end up with the classic "teenaged boy trying to look older peach fuzz" style. Which would suck. Quite badly.
Nicola remarks that I should go for a "Shakespearian" mustache. I'm not sure what she even means by that (are Shakespearian actors prone to growing Mo's?), until she explains that she meant the sort of 'tache Shakespeare himself wore. To the internet!
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| Errr... Maybe not. |
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| OK, that's a bit better, I suppose. Plus, I like the earring. Makes him look like a pirate! |
Maybe I'll just decide later.
On day three, Alex informs me that "Daddy prickly", which I take to be a sign that I should shave. Normally I'd not bother for a while yet, but the spirit of Movember is very much mustaches, not designer stubble that you eventually shave into a mustache. I grab my razor and perform my first jaw only shave. It's an odd sensation and I can't shake the feeling that I've forgotten to do something when I'm finished. I am aware of my top lip in a way that I have never been before. I look in the mirror to admire my mo'.
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| I'm going to need to see some ID. |
Sigh. I've got a long way to go...
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